Sexuality

We can distinguish in human beings a biological sexuality, aimed at reproduction, a more “human” sexuality focused on pleasure, and a sexuality of the third type involving, jointly with its drive dimension (emotional and sexual), a subtle dimension. linked to the extrasensory, which is in fact the very quintessence of the feeling of love.

The amorous magic that poets sing about is characteristic of this higher form of love experience; Novalis spoke of elective affinities, to designate this sort of attunement which transcends feelings. Sexology is primarily concerned with biological functioning, modeled on animal copulation. Pornography, for its part, feeds on the search for pleasure coupled with a reaction training against the guilt reflexes linked to “lust”, without succeeding in eliminating a certain disgust for sex without love.

What is the position of evolutionary ecopsychology? The discovery of the role of Eros in the development of extrasensory faculties, and permanent access to the transcendent dimension, lead to a unitary vision of the biological, hedonic and transcendent aspects of the romantic and sexual experience. The divide between these different dimensions is in reality the consequence of a millennial drift whose content must be precisely defined.

Here are some guidelines for the natural laws of sexual fulfillment, as they have been extracted from observations on the links between love and extrasensory development:
Pleasure should not be pursued for its own sake, but welcomed as a sort of guide indicating appropriate behavior. Subject to avoiding any cause of parasitic excitation of the nervous system (excitements, drugs, aphrodisiacs, sex toys, etc.), it indicates by nature the path which must be followed to allow the different impulses to achieve their transcendent goal.

The impulses specific to procreation (possession-copulation-ejaculation) only occupy a secondary place compared to other sexual activities. In fact, only a small number are needed to ensure the reproduction of the species.

The majority of erotic drives (“polyporphe” drives in Freudian vocabulary) have as their goal neither fertilization nor organic pleasure. Beyond desire, possession and the search for pleasure, they are by nature associated with a sensation of magic, an evanescent but essential guarantee of an authentic exchange of transcendent energy. Orgasm must be felt as an opening to the sacred, free from all thought, will or calculation.

It remains very delicate to talk about this form of romantic relationship, words and thoughts risk crushing its subtlety in the bud. Its fragility explains the origin of esotericism (teaching reserved for “elected”) and the mysteries maintained around “initiations” (mysteries of Eleusis, Garden of Earthly Delights by Hieronymus Bosch, etc.), as well as the apparent superiority of a reductionist culture capable of invading the public field without firing a shot.

Experience shows that any interference from the ego is incompatible with this third type of romantic relationship, causing it to fall from a magical plane to that of animal copulation. This in itself is not very far from rape. Indeed, anyone who feels their partner slipping on a biological or calculating level, devoid of romantic magic, automatically experiences rejection impulses, whether they let them express themselves or not, so that the continuation of the relationship is equivalent to a real or virtual constraint.

We find a crystallization of these negative emotions in offensive vocabulary, almost always of sexual inspiration (fuck you, you idiot, motherfucker, etc.), or even in ribald humor, characteristic of our Western culture. They also cross over into adolescent vocabulary: we hear in terms like “chick”, “bitch”, “fuck” a whole contempt for a sexuality felt to be degraded even though it is at the center of the concerns of this age.

The feeling of romantic magic is often present at the start of a relationship, particularly in the state we call “love at first sight”. It clearly indicates that it is something much higher than simple biological or sentimental impulses. The difficulty is to preserve it when the relationship continues.

Everything that is likely to destroy it, such as the search for pleasure (for oneself or for the other), feelings of guilt, invasive gestures, unnecessary words, repetitiveness, orgastic haste, etc. must be avoided or silenced before taking up too much space in conscience or behavior. The modesty-gêne must be replaced by a modesty-respection of the sacred. Love-attachment by “oblative” love: not to think “I love you you love me”, but “the love that passes between us connects us to transcendence”. Or better: to nourish any thought.

We must also learn to go beyond possessiveness, jealousy, the binarity of the couple as we recorded the model from early childhood in the conventional family. These elements derive directly from the ego and must give way to an opening of the heart avoiding the feeling of confinement in a repetitive relationship. These are most certainly innate impulses, if we believe the inevitability of adulterous impulses despite everything that has been undertaken to eradicate them.
The cyclical emergence of libertinism, rampérisme, polyamour and other movements punctuating history pleads in the same direction. Things are clearing up if we understand that love is not a matter of alpha couple or macho domination, but an exchange of energy ensuring the spiritual evolution of the individual.

It is not easy to get out of the classic driving patterns and to find this “original innocence”. A great inner work is necessary in order to deconstruct all the cultural elements, moral precepts, feelings of guilt, sexological discourse, pornographic images, school sexual education, “disconnected” sexual experiences, stigmatizations, justifications, rationalizations, religious beliefs and other engrams likely to parasitize consciousness.
But it is at this price that romantic and sexual impulses - Eros in the ancient sense of the term - can reach its transcendent goal. Eros was a god. The subject, as vast as it is fundamental, is deepened in different chapters of the training course.